Not Setting Goals: How Fear Runs The Show

Something that I think not a lot of people realize is that not setting goals is actually a very intelligent self protective mechanism. If you never set a goal, if you never have big dreams, if you never allow yourself to hope or trust that things will be great for you, then you never have to risk disappointment if things don’t work out. You also never have to be accountable for follow-through. You never have to worry about letting yourself down or letting others down; You don’t risk the embarrassment of talking about something and then it not manifesting, either in the way that you wanted to or within a timeline that you expected.

A common response to someone talking about their goals or dreams is, “Well, I could never.” Or, “That’s just not in the cards for me.” Or, “I’m just not that type of person.” 

And I think it’s important to recognize that this is a self protective mechanism because our egos are really tricky and smart. They are going to find creative ways to convince us that the things that we believe are 100% true and we don’t ever have to question it. It just is what it is. But if you can look at those thoughts as separate from you and see them for what they are (an adaptive ego trying to avoid pain/shame/discomfort/embarrassment)… the you have the ability to shift things by working with some of your fears and anxieties and phobias or traumas. You can help yourself feel safer in your own body by better understanding and getting clear on what it is that you truly want without the filter of your fears or limiting narratives preventing you from seeing your truth and following through on your goals.